ITS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THIS WAY: Finding unexpected strength when disappointments leave you shattered. Author: Lysa TerKeurst
Hello! It has been a while since our last posting (hint: warm weather distractions), but the research for my own healing as well as my clients’ never stops! Today I wanted to share a book that I read recently that has added SO much value to my life. The words in this book are not only practical, but I believe they are spiritually sound and speak to my soul.
So come along on this journey with me and discover why this book can add some great value to your life and give you hope through whatever circumstances you might find yourself in.
Heads Up: This book is based on Christian principles, and therefore the experience I will be sharing is in alignment with the Christian perspective. Although this book speaks very clearly to those searching for biblical support, I believe the concept of disappointment is a pervasive experience across humanity, so anyone can find some nugget of hope within these pages but may feel somewhat alienated if biblical faith practices are not something that speak to you.
To begin with, the subtitle for this book already demonstrates that there will be some seeds of hope hidden inside.
The jacket says this: ‘It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way’- Finding unexpected strength when disappointments leave you shattered.
WOW. Ok, this one sentence helps me understand that the author gets it. She knows that life is full of disappointment and struggle and is willing to share her tools to overcome it. This is a book written by someone who has been through the experience of great disappointment, has felt the defeat and lived to tell the tale. I feel as though I have literally said these exact words a time or two in my life- “It’s not supposed to be this way” or “why is this happening?” But there is HOPE. There is an answer to these questions and feelings of sheer pain: it is found in our RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD.
Helpful Feature: After each chapter, there are scriptures and questions for your own contemplation and reflection. This is so you can personally apply the principles shared based on the unique situation you may find yourself in. The platform for this is called “Going to the Well”, biblically drawing the reader to the symbolic experience of seeking the Lord for living water and finding healing from what pains you.
The author is blatantly honest about her struggle to overcome her broken marriage among other trials. She was on the heels of just releasing her last book, and was met with having to actually apply it to her life in VERY REAL ways. She expresses her utter disappointment, embarrassment, lack of trust and her journey to push through and find healing on the other side. This is not a ‘make lemonade out of lemons’ kind of book. This is about digging deep, working through the pain with people in your life and with God, and finding hope THROUGH the process rather than pushing away from it.
Disappointment does not discriminate. It is something that goes hand in hand with this idealistic, comparison-ridden world we live in. The author takes this head on just in the first few pages of the book- expressing that the life she currently lives is not even close to the one she had envisioned for herself. HELLOOOOO REALITY!
My ideas, goals, hopes and even motivations look completely different than the story I had created in my head. In my naiveté, I never pictured “bad” things happening (Insert hand-to-forehead emoji). Who WOULD plan for disappointment? But as a Christian, I was never promised that I would not have hard times, in fact, biblically we are told that we WOULD experience hardships as followers of Christ (Acts14:22). The reality that life has hardships isn’t meant to derail you from living your life. It is actually meant to lend itself to you holding up the “plan” you created for your life and giving it to God, the one who is truly in control of it all. This book is a beautiful access point for those kinds of discussions with Him.
Similar to disappointment being a part of the human condition, the author touches on the strength to overcome. Inner strength is available to everyone and resides deep down in our souls. This is my nugget of truth that I hope all who are hurting can accept within themselves-
-YOU ARE STRONGER THAN WHAT YOUR FEELINGS TELL YOU IN THE MOMENT-
Our strength to endure and persevere means we must go beyond what our eyes and bodies tell us are our limits. We can all use that hand that reaches down to us when we feel we are at the lowest of our lows, and I hope we ALL take it.
This is a book for you if:
- You find yourself struggling to make sense of why your pain has been necessary.
- You desire to move through some disappointments in your life and you need some stepping-stones to get you on the path.
- You tend to lose faith when you hit rocky times and desire something to help pull you back to it.
- You are looking for perspective and practical truths to apply to a challenging situation.
- You simply understand life can be hard and value gaining more understanding on how to process through difficult times.
Check it out! : )
August 19, 2019- Toni Greco M.A., LPC